It was my hair appointment day. I normally have one about every 10-12 weeks. New hair extensions and a cut.
I hate the process. The hour or so when my old extensions are out, but my new ones are not yet in, is agony. It sounds pathetic but without the security of those extra inches, I do not feel like me and of course, in the hairdressers there are all those silly mirrors and all I can see is this reflection that does not look like me at all. It is horrible and really throws me. For that hour or so, I act differently and squirm a lot. I'm not always the most confident or bubbliest of people but there I am so, soo lost, so awkward and completly dazed. I guess for more then four years now, I have worn extensions everywhere. I even made sure my clips in were in securely when I did a parachute jump in Australia. For me, they have become like a piece of clothing (and more), without them I am naked and very self-concious.
I don't really know how to explain it. I know how silly it sounds but I can't help the way I feel. Somebody said maybe I feel how those girls feel who get their nails done every week or so and then for some reason stop.
I know it is a silly thing to get so worked up over and I know, that it is all relative. If, God forbid, I had some awful news at the salon about my health or somebody close to me or some other real 'crisis' happened then I know that my hair would be forgotten just like that. I know there are many people in the world with real, real worries that I can not even comprehend but when it is just me, my hair and the mirror then I can't help it, a switch goes off and I do not think about that and all I think about is my hair. It is not necessarily that I think the extensions look better. It is just that I identify myself now as somebody with all that hair and when there is some reminder that I haven't really got all that much hair then something in me gets confused. I'm not sure, it is difficult to explain. I think if you're thinking of getting extensions or indeed any kind of fakery, you should consider the addiction factor and what that could cost you both in money and confidence.
Anyway, never mind, normally it is just a hour or two and before long, I'm skipping out of the salon with my extra inches and for the first two weeks or so, that new hair is so shiny, soft and silky and basically I'm a very happy girl.
Normally . . .
Old extensions out and then argh, I'm told my new hair hasn't arrived and I have got 24 hours plus au naturalle.
Oh and by the way, au naturelle was cut quite nicely at the back (free of charge, for obvious reasons ie. I had lost half a barnet!!!) but the front (where the work was so badly needed) had to be left until extension time for blending reasons.
My first thought was rush home, lock the door and cry (again pathetic, I know).
I didn't cry (maybe because my Sideways Cross necklace was waiting for me) but I did rush home and I did think about getting my clip in extensions out but then I thought, this is bad. Nobody can see me and well, I'm not planning on having short hair for a while so make the most of it so I had a bit of a play. Styling my hair this way and that and I have to concede that my natural hair is slightly more versatile then I feared.
This is my favourite style of the day.
I love this look. I think it is really girly, pretty and timeless. It took me two minutes at the most.
I can do it with my extensions but normally don't bother as it takes, at least, three times as long and is a bit more complicated. I had a bit of help from the hairdresser with this version (shown above) last year. It is all that trying to backcomb the hair without matting or getting it caught/tangled in the rows, pulling the sides of the hair back smoothly while trying to keep all the rows concealed, trying to find and attach a clip (or combination of clips/bands) to keep all that hair in place.
So in conclusion, I will be going back for my extensions tomorrow but the surprise break we had from each other was maybe not as painful as I imagined.
Maybe in fact, it was a very, very, very small step on the road to recovery from my chronic addiction which is good in light of the infamous Naomi Campbell picture which hit the newstands recently. It is alleged that she may have some form of alopecia due to adorning hair extensions.
Like some smokers and many people addicted to all different things, I do intend to give my extensions up. One day!
Have you ever had any shock, horror experiences at the hairdressers? Do you change your hair often or is there only one way/colour/length you would ever have your barnet styled?